60 Responses to “10 Things I Wish I’d Known Earlier About the Birds & the Bees”


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  1. Thanks, Katie…For those of use who grew up being wild, free, barefooted girls, running into the wall of conformity and expectation was a hard hit, and it did sting. I’m amazed at the stings I remember, the exact words. I could recreate the scene. With time and a gentle spirit, the stings heal. They turn into opportunities for us to experience courage and unconditional love.
    .-= Jane Rochelle´s last blog ..When Weariness Sets In- Be Gentle With Yourself =-.

    • Hi Jane. Yes, “with time and a gentle spirit” they do heal. I’m glad to hear yours, though vivid, have been turned into opportunities for growth and love. That’s wonderful.

  2. I love birds, and I love bees, and I feel that many of those birds would love for those focused, 1-pointed bee’s stingers to be directed at them still… but in a different way ;)
    .-= Jason Fonceca´s last blog ..Papercut Tracy Baker Jason Fonceca 2010 =-.

  3. Katie, I loved reading your honest, insightful post. I think many of us have had these painful bee stings growing up, made to feel awkward and unattractive. For me, it was being very near-sighted and wearing thick glasses. In high school, I’d walk around without them which meant that I looked better but that I couldn’t recognize my best friend across the street.

    We survived and learned to thrive, but I’m concerned about what some young women have to endure these days. Doesn’t it sometimes go Beyond Bee Stings?
    .-= Madeleine Kolb´s last blog ..Pilgrimage to Site of First Flight =-.

    • Madeleine, it’s funny you should mention young women. I’ve been thinking a lot about younger women and pre-teens and what they endure today. I’ve watched my daughter deal with her own stings, but it is a different world than when we were children. I’m thinking of developing some materials for younger people so they can connect to some of these ideas too. Thank you for sharing your own experience. All the best.

  4. I’d say ouch but you are over them and these memories are now exactly where they need to be: IN the very back of your mind to serve as the best lessons in life and to share in inspiring blog posts with your readers, Katie!
    My memory is awful but I remember in Turkey, a boy that sat next to me told me my eyes are too big. Mind you, he was himself the ugliest creature in all of that class if not the school – and I know today I have the most beautiful pair of eyes but why on earth can I not forget that part of my memory, I wish I knew that!
    Thank you for another great post on a lovely Tuesday!!!!!

  5. Deb J

    What a lovely post. Yes, the stings can be many and the memory can last a lifetime. Yet, it is only as we grow into ourselves that we realize that we are not only the stung but sometimes the stinger. Now that I’m learning about birds, I’m much better at not stinging or letting stings hurt.

  6. Awwww..Katie. You got me a little teary today. I feel like I know you a little bit better after reading this post. Thanks for being real.

    .-= Courtney Carver´s last blog ..Minimalism Misconceptions =-.

    • I do feel a little naked, Courtney, but I’m learning more and more, that honesty is the only way to blog. I love your blog. You stand up for what’s important to you and I really appreciate that.

  7. katie – I can relate to so many of “the stings”, especially the lips one but the bees just got it wrong. I love my lips now but I hated them for years! Your image of birds is just lovely – I’m sure many, many people will relate to this sensitive post and think about how they are now and how those childhood experiences shaped them into the adults they are today. more please! mark

    • Mark, awww, that’s so sweet that you love your lips. Funny how the small stings stay with us, but somehow make us embrace ourselves even more deeply as we age. Like you say, we are “shaped” by them. Thanks for commenting and keep going with your blog. You’ve got so much to share.

  8. Katie,

    Thank you so much for this wonderful article and participating in the Life Lessons Series. That means a lot to me. :)
    .-= Abubakar Jamil´s last undefined ..If you register your site for free at =-.

  9. Katie, this is so touching and inspirational. Those stings sure do hurt, but what joy there is when we learn how strong our wings are and how high we can fly. Time to tweet this post and let it fly on.
    .-= Jean Sarauer´s last blog ..How to be Your Own Blog Post Fairy =-.

  10. A beautiful post Katie. Who hasn’t been stung before? I love what you said about people inflecting pain on others not knowing any better. This is where we can have compassion even for the people who hurt us.

    From the stings we learn and grow to love who we truly are.

    Thanks for this insightful message.
    .-= Manal´s last blog ..5 Easy Steps to Understand and Deal With Temptation =-.

    • Manal, that compassion you speak of is so very important in getting to that place where we can love ourselves. Forgiveness is a big part of it. So happy you enjoyed the post and found inspiration in it.

  11. Katie, no bird nor bee can hide your beautiful soul shining through this post. I think it’s so important to trust in the natural progression of things, of life. Oh sure, life is littered with bird poop and bee stings but the soul, if we feed it, has a way of navigating itself. Thanks for a good dose of wisdom here today.

    • Hey Belinda, you make me laugh. Yes, “bird poop and bee stings” can’t stop our natural flow. You seem to have found a way to feed your soul, and go with the flow of your soul, and it shines through in your posts every day.

  12. This is beautiful… truly an amazing post. I’m going to share it with the ladies in my eating disorder recovery group.
    .-= Jill Will Run´s last blog ..Evolution of Road Rash =-.

    • Jill, your comment and your blog have rocked my world. I had tears in my eyes looking at the photos of your poor wounded face. Thank God your healing so fast. Your story is very inspiring. You are such a determined woman and you make me want to kick some serious ass in whatever I set out to accomplish. I would be honoured if you feel this post would help anyone feel better about themselves or help them get through something tough or traumatic. Go Jill!

  13. Katie,

    What a wonderful ways of writing with Birds and Bees and linking them to a life. I would have never imagined to think of it this way, thanks for showing me alternate ways of looking at life lessons.
    .-= Preeti @ Heart and Mind´s last blog ..No Spend Month Challenge- Update 1 =-.

  14. Wonderful post. I definitely had my share of bee stings! I was constantly teased starting around grade 7 and called everything from frog-eyes to sewer creature (lol!) by a group of boys who thought they were hot stuff. Cool thing I noticed, though, was that two boys–the very nicest, most good-looking boys I knew–never made fun and they stuck up for me a few times. That sure helped to see the character of my oppressors! lol

    I moved away from my small town right after high school, and about 15 years later I was visiting family. We went to the small shopping mall, and there was the ringleader–loitering and smoking and looking very grubby with what looked like a bunch of unemployed painters or construction workers, or something like that. No shame in that, really, but it was nowhere near the lofty position he assumed so many years ago lol I admit I felt extremely smug :)

    Glad to read your uplifting post.
    .-= Leah McClellan´s last blog ..Empathy- The Misunderstood E-Word =-.

    • Oh my Leah, you always have such great stories. Revenge is sweet sometimes, but likely these were unhappy boys … or just sniveling little shits. Either way, I’m glad you came out of those early experiences with only minor wounds and your glorious and biting sense of humour intact, aimed and ready to fire away at will.

      • lol Glad you like my stories. Oh yeah, unhappy boys…they had to learn their ways from somewhere–I mean, you know bullies come from very painful places. I didn’t know that back then, and it hurt, a lot (it went on for years–add pizza face to the list when I had a bad case of pimples lol). But what can you do but get over it or not?
        .-= Leah McClellan´s last blog ..Empathy- The Misunderstood E-Word =-.

  15. Katie, we should all collectively thank the bee stingers for the wonderful help they gave us, as children and teenagers, in building our characters! If only we had the wisdom at that age, to realise that they were actually teaching us how to develop our own inner strength!

    I constantly felt the sting from being teased for having curly hair, when straight hair was “in”, and also for being Australian, and speaking with a strong English accent! (My whole family were English).

    Thank you for yet another wonderfully insightful post. :)
    .-= Joanne Keevers´s last blog ..On a Natural High =-.

    • Thank you bee stingers! There, I did it. Hopefully, now you embrace your lovely hair and accent. Glad you enjoyed the post. My daughter has been reading everyone’s comments and she just loves how everyone is sharing their stings. Thank you, Joanne.

  16. Very true what you say about the bee stings – without them we would not have evolved quite the way we have. My bee stings have made me a compassionate human being. They no longer sting rather they have turned to gold. – or as you say, “What slowly heals those stings is our soul. It shines back at us when we look in the mirror.”

    This is an incredibly inspiring post. How wonderful it would be if it were given to every child, teenager, and lost soul.
    .-= Aileen´s last blog ..Simple Stress Release- Breathe =-.

    • That is wonderful Aileen. Gold! I agree with you that children and teens need this kind of advice. I wonder if they would hear it or be able to absorb it. Thank you for your ever soulful comments.

  17. Hi Katie. That is such a lovely post. Love the bees and birds analogy. Very beautifully done.

  18. Such a brave and beautiful post. Thanks Katie.

  19. I guess I didn’t know as much about birds and bees before I read this post! Thanks for sharing, really wonderful story to remember, especially when some people judge you or attack you when you don’t deserve it. We are unique individuals, with a beauty of our own to protect and share with the people we love. ;)
    .-= Joyce at What Would You Do In Heaven?´s last blog ..What’s So Cute About a Baby =-.

  20. Oh Katie! Fantastic post!

    I wish I’d known that some bees don’t realize there’s more than one kind of beauty and more than one way to do things.

    Just perfect.

    I can still remember all of my stings! OUCH. But now I know about the list.

    Thank you for the wonderful words and peek into your experience.

  21. I knew I didn’t like those darn bees from the time I walked straight into the middle of a hornets nest while camping as a young child, collectively those darn critters nearly killed me.

    What a great analogy of the birds and the bees.

    I want to be a bird and I want to surround myself with only birds. (even though they pooped on my laundry hanging outside yesterday)…I still like birds.

    Thanks for another great post!

    • Thanks for the kudos. Sounds like you’ve had some rough times with hornets and bird poop, but you’re staying positive. Guess that’s all part of it. Taking shit and yet continuing to smile. Cheers!

  22. Katie this was a beautiful post. I was right there with you as a 9 year old I remember it well. But you turned it around so beautifully and made it a wonderful learning experience.

    Thank you
    .-= Marion Anderson´s last blog ..The ONE Lesson I Wish I had Learned Sooner in Life =-.

  23. Great post Katie – birds just happen to be my favorite!

    I don’t remember any stings from other kids – I think I was too busy stinging myself to look up and notice. No worries though, my wings are in pretty good shape these days. I’m happy we get to soar together here on the web.
    .-= Alison Kerr´s last blog ..Nine Reasons to Nature Garden =-.

    • Alison, Too bad about that self-stinging, but it’s good that your wings healed. This is a fun journey we’re on, isn’t it? I can’t wait to see to what heights we’ll all fly.

  24. Loved this, Katie! I think your point about not allowing these stings to touch hits the nail on the head.

    When we find ourselves placing importance and significance on something negative that someone says about us, we should immediately check to make sure we’re only extracting the constructive criticism from it and discard the rest.

    Capturing the negativity that others push towards us and then holding onto it only causes us long-term pain and suffering!

    Thanks for sharing your story!
    .-= Raam Dev´s last blog ..7 Pieces of Advice for my Younger Self =-.

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    • Thanks Nitric. Just found your awesome comment in my spam bin and I set it free. I appreciate your sticking around – I aim for stickiness whenever possible on this blog. Cheers!

  26. Hi Katie,
    I’ve just read this after being invited to participate in the Lessons. You’re an amazing writer. Very creative. I think I’ll forward this to my grandchildren age 16 and 13.

  27. I just don’t like the “birds are instictual” kinda sounds like Sarah Pallins “mothers just kinda know”